In spite of (and maybe even because of) all of these things, I fully believe that my kids will turn out to be wonderful adults who I will love, admire, and respect with all of my heart! Annabelle tells me "I love you Mommy" more times a day than I can count, and Corgan (even though he wants everyone to think he's a grump) is so sweet and full of love! Both of my kids are generally very polite, and I get compliments from others on how well behaved they are (even when I think they've been behaving like terrors). Just like every other mother out there, I've read all of the articles, I've watched all of the tv shows, I've seen (but not necessarily read) all of the books, I've listened to all of the stories of other moms, I've discussed things with my husband, and I've decided on the best way to raise MY children. I don't take these decisions lightly, and in fact, many of the ideals that I had about the kind of parent I would be long before I even had children of my own are still pretty in line with what I practice now. I realize that I will always have more to learn about being a parent and always welcome advice when I'm struggling. I am not easily swayed by "new findings" about traditional parenting being the wrong thing to do. I think a lot of that has to do with learning from my mother's example.
Many of the things that I listed above about what makes me NOT a perfect modern mom are the things that I believe DID make my mom a perfect for our family. I'm sure my brother and sister would 100% agree with me when I say that we never had any doubt that we were loved beyond words (even "up to Jesus' castle and back"), we never had any issues with acting like bullies because we were spanked or over confident, we all did well in school and in the sports and activities that we chose to participate in and never once felt like a failure if we weren't the best, and we all had lots of friends from many of the different typical cliques in school. As adults, we are all very confident in everything that we do, have chosen mates who bring out the best in us and support us, are not sickly people (except when the kids bring the viruses around... then there's just no hope anyway), we eat our vegetables (except for Kyle and his salads), and have relatively healthy eating habits. All 3 of us probably don't get as much sleep as most people do... but maybe we just don't need it. We share a love for God just like our parents do, and we love and appreciate our parents more than they'll ever know! All 3 of us have varying personalities as well, and it was obvious to us even then that our parents adjusted to what each of us needed at the time. I'm not by any means saying that we were perfect kids or that we're perfect as adults, but I think we turned out to be pretty darn good people!
Maybe it's because of the confidence that my parents instilled in me, but I fully believe that as a parent, you equip yourself with all of the "facts" (which are always subject to change) and studies and stories, but then just go with your instincts about how to raise your children because no matter what worked for someone else's kids, they weren't your kids. And no doctor or book or article or other mom should make you feel guilty for the decisions that you've made for your family. If you really love your kids and want the best for them (What mother doesn't?), then you will know their personalities and their individual needs the very best!